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| The New York Optimist March 2009 |
F-Flossing- What's the point of the "unwaxed" floss.Do they want to kill you, is that really supposed to work.. Ever try getting an UN waxed
piece of floss between your teeth and not bleed? That is insane.Must have been invented by Nazis. OR how about when people "floss" with a
tooth pick at the dining table? hate that...
G-Gargling..Ok, so in keeping with the above them of hygiene, lets discuss gargling. How many times do you rinse and gargle in one shot?
once, twice, 4 times? How about the person who gargles with their head back for like 5 minutes and appears to actually get into it like they
are singing a bad aria? Annoying...
H- Hand holding You know, there is an art and a method to holding hands. When you are first dating it is understood there will be hand
holding awkwardness.But, if after a few dates you still do not hold hands the "right way", I would be concerned! When you join hands as you
walk in the street, take notice- how do your fingers mesh and are the thumbs out of place?If you both cant seem to find where to put your
thumbs, you may want to give the "thumbs down" to this relationship. If the guy offers his hand and it is a light weak wrist hold, watch out-
he may be to wishy washy! Too strong a hold, possessive!
I- Intermission What is with the long usually unnecessary pause of a broadway or off-broadway play? What are they doing all that time.. I
know the audience looks silly and awkward after 5-7 minutes. They went to the bathroom, got an overpriced drink at the theater concession,
and then start to squirm in their seats impatiently.And what about the cast, I know they need to break after all that singing, dancing,
talking.but c'mon..are they taking a nap too? Are they sitting backstage, laughing about the guy with the toupee in the front row?
Intermissions are generally wayyy too long..
J-Joking Why do people who often feel the need to joke, are usually the ones who are the LEAST funny? They are also the same people who
LAUGH at their own jokes BEFORE anyone else even gets a chance to cognitively process the joke and respond! Ok enough joking, I will
stop here.. Feel free to write to me with your thoughts about F-J or start off the letter "K" for next week's article..
Enjoy! Ellie
piece of floss between your teeth and not bleed? That is insane.Must have been invented by Nazis. OR how about when people "floss" with a
tooth pick at the dining table? hate that...
G-Gargling..Ok, so in keeping with the above them of hygiene, lets discuss gargling. How many times do you rinse and gargle in one shot?
once, twice, 4 times? How about the person who gargles with their head back for like 5 minutes and appears to actually get into it like they
are singing a bad aria? Annoying...
H- Hand holding You know, there is an art and a method to holding hands. When you are first dating it is understood there will be hand
holding awkwardness.But, if after a few dates you still do not hold hands the "right way", I would be concerned! When you join hands as you
walk in the street, take notice- how do your fingers mesh and are the thumbs out of place?If you both cant seem to find where to put your
thumbs, you may want to give the "thumbs down" to this relationship. If the guy offers his hand and it is a light weak wrist hold, watch out-
he may be to wishy washy! Too strong a hold, possessive!
I- Intermission What is with the long usually unnecessary pause of a broadway or off-broadway play? What are they doing all that time.. I
know the audience looks silly and awkward after 5-7 minutes. They went to the bathroom, got an overpriced drink at the theater concession,
and then start to squirm in their seats impatiently.And what about the cast, I know they need to break after all that singing, dancing,
talking.but c'mon..are they taking a nap too? Are they sitting backstage, laughing about the guy with the toupee in the front row?
Intermissions are generally wayyy too long..
J-Joking Why do people who often feel the need to joke, are usually the ones who are the LEAST funny? They are also the same people who
LAUGH at their own jokes BEFORE anyone else even gets a chance to cognitively process the joke and respond! Ok enough joking, I will
stop here.. Feel free to write to me with your thoughts about F-J or start off the letter "K" for next week's article..
Enjoy! Ellie
Ellie Robyns: In My Own Words
