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| The New York Optimist |
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"Cafe Couples"
-Ellie Robyns
Why would someone in this extremely populated city, sit in a cafe on their computer in order to interact with another
person? Is the person sitting right next to you or the guy or gal who just passed you on line(a real line), not good enough?
Are people today too shy or overwhelmed with stress? They find that "chatting" on their computer is sufficient interaction
and is "safer?" Do people really WANT to meet each other today for a real relationship and they just no longer know how
to go about it ?
I have been asked many times, why, if there are so many men and women to meet in new york city, is it so difficult for
people to actually meet and form long lasting relationships? I think it has a lot to do with the fact of just HOW MANY
people are in the city today. The sheer numbers are overwhelming! It has become in large part, about quantity vs. quality.
Add to that, the high stress level faced by new yorkers in these economic times, makes many just want to head to a bar to
drown their sorrows or straight home after work, because they are too tired to do anything else. The weekend comes, and
they are working so hard, they did not make plans and then feel stuck with nothing to do. Boredom kicks in, and then
moments of depression.
The best way to counter this is to be proactive, If only slightly proactive. It will make all the difference.
If you are single and sincerely interested in meeting a mate for a long term relationship, then you need to put it out there
that you are AVAILABLE!
Ok you dont need a building billboard! A small office window sign will do.Just kidding!
Letting your friends and family know you are available, perhaps a close colleague, your gym manager, your rabbi/pastor
are great ways of meeting the right person. There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with doing this. You may think people
dont care or you dont want to bother them. But you are not. Most would like to fix you up. Everyone knows someone.
Use Facebook, ask to "shop" on your friend's list.
Basically, going through networks is much more practical then heading to bars or just relying on online dating or chat
rooms.So next time you sit at a cafe,you can actually be sitting next to a real person enjoying an overpriced coffee
together, discussing "live", how you both secretly prefer Dunkin Donuts to Starbucks!
Good luck and Good love!
Ellie
-Ellie Robyns
Why would someone in this extremely populated city, sit in a cafe on their computer in order to interact with another
person? Is the person sitting right next to you or the guy or gal who just passed you on line(a real line), not good enough?
Are people today too shy or overwhelmed with stress? They find that "chatting" on their computer is sufficient interaction
and is "safer?" Do people really WANT to meet each other today for a real relationship and they just no longer know how
to go about it ?
I have been asked many times, why, if there are so many men and women to meet in new york city, is it so difficult for
people to actually meet and form long lasting relationships? I think it has a lot to do with the fact of just HOW MANY
people are in the city today. The sheer numbers are overwhelming! It has become in large part, about quantity vs. quality.
Add to that, the high stress level faced by new yorkers in these economic times, makes many just want to head to a bar to
drown their sorrows or straight home after work, because they are too tired to do anything else. The weekend comes, and
they are working so hard, they did not make plans and then feel stuck with nothing to do. Boredom kicks in, and then
moments of depression.
The best way to counter this is to be proactive, If only slightly proactive. It will make all the difference.
If you are single and sincerely interested in meeting a mate for a long term relationship, then you need to put it out there
that you are AVAILABLE!
Ok you dont need a building billboard! A small office window sign will do.Just kidding!
Letting your friends and family know you are available, perhaps a close colleague, your gym manager, your rabbi/pastor
are great ways of meeting the right person. There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with doing this. You may think people
dont care or you dont want to bother them. But you are not. Most would like to fix you up. Everyone knows someone.
Use Facebook, ask to "shop" on your friend's list.
Basically, going through networks is much more practical then heading to bars or just relying on online dating or chat
rooms.So next time you sit at a cafe,you can actually be sitting next to a real person enjoying an overpriced coffee
together, discussing "live", how you both secretly prefer Dunkin Donuts to Starbucks!
Good luck and Good love!
Ellie
